It began with the question of whether or not I trusted His Creation. Did I trust that my body was truly made to do this? I mean, women did this back in the day, but that was before these AWESOME DRUGS had been created!! So here was my disclaimer, "I'm gonna try to do it naturally, BUT I'M GONNA LEAVE MY OPTIONS OPEN"... lol. This was my way of making sure that if I had to punk out then it was already put out there before hand.
So let's back up to Monday June 14, 2010. I had been leaking some type of fluid since the previous Thursday. I didn't tell my doctor because I was told (by google.. DON'T JUDGE ME) that discharge picks up drastically at the end of the third trimester when it got closer to delivery time. So, of course my doctor gave me the business about not calling him.. i relented and apologized. After he checked me he said that it wasn't amniotic fluid but that the sac was bulging through my cervix... the begging began= At the Doctor's office trying to get the sympathy of my OBGYN... "Please Dr. Harris!! Can you just break my water??? OR SHOW ME HOW???".. Dr. Harris: "Beat it! Do you know how many of these requests I get in a day? This is your first baby, sorry... but i'm gonna just let your body go into labor whenever it wants to"... Me: "YOU HATE ME DON'T YOU!!!" Followed by incoherent sobs and ramblings about how it was because i was black.. lol (Even though my doctor and everybody IN my doctor's office is black). Dr. Harris just gave me the dead eyes, told me to take a hike and to call him if the contractions pick up. I just got up and wobbled my fat butt out of the doctor's office.
Then there was Tuesday. My doctor has a website where you can instant message him all through out the day if needed. I got on to the website and tried one mo' gin! Me: "Doctor Harris... is there ANYTHING I CAN DO?!?!?! I mean is there something I can do to bring about my labor... I can barely walk and my back is hurting... *ouch* ... see!!! It even hurts to type Dr. Harris!!!!" Dr. Harris (i don't even have to see him to know he's giving me the face): "Michelle... HAVE SEX!!! I know you don't want to lolol.. but it works! You and your husband get busy!! Sheesh!" Me: "SEE! I KNEW YOU HATED ME"... what follows were sobs and expletives that i'm sure i'm forgiven for because of my level of agony. lolol...
Tuesday Night... I sucked it up and was about to just do it. YES- THEE "it"! I went to the bathroom with tears in my eyes... I mean, at this point, I'll do ANYTHING! If my doctor would have told me that doing the kid n play was the only way to go into labor, me and Vaughan would have been clickin' ankles right then and there! I know some of you are like, "what's wrong with having sex with your husband"... WELP! Let's see how much you wanna have sex when you have to pee every 10 minutes, your sciatic nerves HATE YOU and you can barely walk... not to mention everything INSIDE of you hurts. What would make you want to put something in there ON PURPOSE?! My poor husband... he was just as sad as I was- Me: "Let me just go pee babe." Vaughan: "*sigh* okay Sweet Pea". It was the longest walk to the bathroom in the HISTORY of walking to the bathroom. It felt like i was walking to an outhouse in the woods. Yes, it was that long of a walk. I was, afterall, walking the "PLANK"! At the end of this walk, I was surely going to die from pain! I stood at the sink after washing my hands and was preparing myself for the long hike back from the "woods" when, at 12:15 am.... God SAVED MY LIFE! He did... I mean my Father in Heaven came down from Heaven & His Throne, took a Holy Needle and poked a hole in my water sac HIMSELF!!! Yes, people, my water broke right at the sink before I had to walk back from the outhouse to my demise! If i hadn't been so fat, i would've done the Mrs. Ruby C-walk Holy Dance RIGHT THERE!
I lept into the hallway, Me: "BABE!!! BABE!!! MY WATER BROKE"!! Vaughan: "THANK YOU JESUS!! I mean, GOOD BABE!!! Let's get rolling"!!! We tore through the house collecting everything we could think of. We got to the hospital at 12:30 am- my contractions started as soon as we got into triage. They were less than 60 seconds apart. I was told that contractions feel like really bad menstrual cramps... NOT!!! They're in the same place that you have menstrual cramps.. but I swear the pain is different. So much so, I had to ask the nurse if what i was feeling was actually contractions. She said, "Uh yeah!"... she's lucky that i was still nice at this point. But I digress...i got into my labor room and my breathing was on POINT... I was standing up and rocking and laboring peeerfectly. I sat on the excercise ball to help open my hips... and aside from the nurse who literally had to stay glued to me with a fetal monitor because i refused to sit still, it was a pretty drama-free experience...kind of... but we won't divulge it all here.
Then cramps went from... "Hi my name is Mrs. Contractions and it's soooo nice to meet you... i'll be with you for just a lil while... feel free to call my by my first name= Labor"...To, "WHAT?! DID YOU JUST CALL ME BY MY FIRST NAME, YO!!!???? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME LIKE THAT... i'M NEVER GOIN' AWAY...EVER!!! CALL ME 'DEATH' BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO KiiiiiiILLLLL YOU", respectively. This is where my trust in Christ got real...
I was going into the "transition" phase of labor. This is where women usually say "Uncle" and get drugs because the pain feels like you have 65 gremlins munching on your insides. This is where your body is transitioning you into full on push mode...it's time to actually have the baby after you get through this phase. Now mind you, usually, when you're in labor, your pain peaks and then subsides for about 3-5 mins or so at first... mine never presented such graces. From 12:30 am until 6:46 am my contractions were less than 60 seconds apart. God was truly there for me! Although that seems like a long time, when you're in labor, you seem to go into some type of time warp. It never feels like it's that long because you're so ingulfed in the happenings of labor.
I was beginning to question whether or not I was going to be able to do it. My husband was a CHAMP! He was calm and helped me breathe well, massaged everything he could and helped me to keep me calm and not panic. I never cried... i never screamed -ok twice-... and I know if it hadn't been for the Lord and my husband.. i would have been scared and SCREAMED "Uncle"! I stalled out at 7 cm and then all of a sudden felt my body start pushing! It scared me because it was totally an unassisted push! Nobody ever told me that your body would do this! The Lord spoke to me... He told me, in His own way, that my body absolutely knew how to do this and I should trust His creation. But i was in pain... I was begging for help... Me: "Nurse is there anything you can give me at this point?!!! I'm not sure I can take much more"- Nurse: "You can do this Michelle, you've done an incredible job.. you're almost there... let me check your cervix one more time". When she checked me, I was at 9 1/2 cm... it only took 20 minutes for me to jump from 7 cm all the way to 9 1/2 cm.. amazing!
My body started to push Josiah hard! He wasn't very pleased about this... he started to move his head from side to side because he's just ornery like that. Something was pushing him...so... he decided he would push back. Me: "NO, NO, NO!!! *OWW* Josiah stop moving!!!" Josiah: "Mrs. Contractions STARTED IT"!! My body then began to really push and I'm trying to tell the nurse that he's about to come and NOW because I can't stop my body from pushing. Right then Dr. Harris, impecable timing I might add, walked in ready to get down to business... my husband stepped outside the door to retrieve the coffee that my sister got for him... terrible timing on his part because my first REAL push, pushed Josiah's head out as soon as Dr. Harris sat down- Vaughan, hearing the monstrous sound that came from my throat area, hurried back in the room only to see his son's lil cone head sticking out.. Vaughan: "HOLY CRAP"... Me: "GRRRRRROWLOIULKKKUJHUFOOIUYURR#E)*(*^#>%$%%%">*%*^&^*&%@!@!!!=6+6=12>>%$%%%!!&@&&&!"..... 30 seconds later at 6:47 am Josiah's whole body flew out of me.
OMG!
His little hand shot up in the air, Me: "OMG!!! SOMEBODY JUST CAME OUT OF ME"...Vaughan: ::-0 !! They put him on my chest... i was instantly smitten. Even the weight of his body on my chest was perfect. He was meant to be there... it was destiny that at that moment in time he was on my chest... smiling at his daddy. Dr. Harris said, "He's a chubber! I bet he weighs 8lbs 8ounces".. everybody put in their own guesses to his weight. Everybody was in shock when he weighed in at exactly 8lbs 8ounces! We all shot a look over at Dr. Harris in disbelief. Amazing. Dr. Harris looked up and me and said, "Did yaw do what i told you to do?" I shouted, "HECKY NAW!! SAVED BY THE BAG"... my water bag that is.
Because I hadn't gotten any drugs... my body began to flood itself with endorphins... i was soooo high... for days i felt euphoric. So while I'm starting to feel high... my sister rips through the room almost running Dr. Harris over to come see Josiah in my arms. Dr. Harris: "Hey yaw! I'm trying to do some work down here guys!" Everybody: ::Ignore:: I cried. I cried because I couldn't believe God had just brought me through something so incredibly scary! Just something so incredible.
I'll stop here... but..
Ladies... it's okay to trust your body. When the pain got so intense that I didn't know if I could take it anymore... I know now that it was the because i was at the end. Seems to be that way with all adversity that rises against His children. He's already given your body everything it needs to give birth. I'm glad I at least gave it a go. He brought me through...
So let's back up to Monday June 14, 2010. I had been leaking some type of fluid since the previous Thursday. I didn't tell my doctor because I was told (by google.. DON'T JUDGE ME) that discharge picks up drastically at the end of the third trimester when it got closer to delivery time. So, of course my doctor gave me the business about not calling him.. i relented and apologized. After he checked me he said that it wasn't amniotic fluid but that the sac was bulging through my cervix... the begging began= At the Doctor's office trying to get the sympathy of my OBGYN... "Please Dr. Harris!! Can you just break my water??? OR SHOW ME HOW???".. Dr. Harris: "Beat it! Do you know how many of these requests I get in a day? This is your first baby, sorry... but i'm gonna just let your body go into labor whenever it wants to"... Me: "YOU HATE ME DON'T YOU!!!" Followed by incoherent sobs and ramblings about how it was because i was black.. lol (Even though my doctor and everybody IN my doctor's office is black). Dr. Harris just gave me the dead eyes, told me to take a hike and to call him if the contractions pick up. I just got up and wobbled my fat butt out of the doctor's office.
Then there was Tuesday. My doctor has a website where you can instant message him all through out the day if needed. I got on to the website and tried one mo' gin! Me: "Doctor Harris... is there ANYTHING I CAN DO?!?!?! I mean is there something I can do to bring about my labor... I can barely walk and my back is hurting... *ouch* ... see!!! It even hurts to type Dr. Harris!!!!" Dr. Harris (i don't even have to see him to know he's giving me the face): "Michelle... HAVE SEX!!! I know you don't want to lolol.. but it works! You and your husband get busy!! Sheesh!" Me: "SEE! I KNEW YOU HATED ME"... what follows were sobs and expletives that i'm sure i'm forgiven for because of my level of agony. lolol...
Tuesday Night... I sucked it up and was about to just do it. YES- THEE "it"! I went to the bathroom with tears in my eyes... I mean, at this point, I'll do ANYTHING! If my doctor would have told me that doing the kid n play was the only way to go into labor, me and Vaughan would have been clickin' ankles right then and there! I know some of you are like, "what's wrong with having sex with your husband"... WELP! Let's see how much you wanna have sex when you have to pee every 10 minutes, your sciatic nerves HATE YOU and you can barely walk... not to mention everything INSIDE of you hurts. What would make you want to put something in there ON PURPOSE?! My poor husband... he was just as sad as I was- Me: "Let me just go pee babe." Vaughan: "*sigh* okay Sweet Pea". It was the longest walk to the bathroom in the HISTORY of walking to the bathroom. It felt like i was walking to an outhouse in the woods. Yes, it was that long of a walk. I was, afterall, walking the "PLANK"! At the end of this walk, I was surely going to die from pain! I stood at the sink after washing my hands and was preparing myself for the long hike back from the "woods" when, at 12:15 am.... God SAVED MY LIFE! He did... I mean my Father in Heaven came down from Heaven & His Throne, took a Holy Needle and poked a hole in my water sac HIMSELF!!! Yes, people, my water broke right at the sink before I had to walk back from the outhouse to my demise! If i hadn't been so fat, i would've done the Mrs. Ruby C-walk Holy Dance RIGHT THERE!
I lept into the hallway, Me: "BABE!!! BABE!!! MY WATER BROKE"!! Vaughan: "THANK YOU JESUS!! I mean, GOOD BABE!!! Let's get rolling"!!! We tore through the house collecting everything we could think of. We got to the hospital at 12:30 am- my contractions started as soon as we got into triage. They were less than 60 seconds apart. I was told that contractions feel like really bad menstrual cramps... NOT!!! They're in the same place that you have menstrual cramps.. but I swear the pain is different. So much so, I had to ask the nurse if what i was feeling was actually contractions. She said, "Uh yeah!"... she's lucky that i was still nice at this point. But I digress...i got into my labor room and my breathing was on POINT... I was standing up and rocking and laboring peeerfectly. I sat on the excercise ball to help open my hips... and aside from the nurse who literally had to stay glued to me with a fetal monitor because i refused to sit still, it was a pretty drama-free experience...kind of... but we won't divulge it all here.
Then cramps went from... "Hi my name is Mrs. Contractions and it's soooo nice to meet you... i'll be with you for just a lil while... feel free to call my by my first name= Labor"...To, "WHAT?! DID YOU JUST CALL ME BY MY FIRST NAME, YO!!!???? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME LIKE THAT... i'M NEVER GOIN' AWAY...EVER!!! CALL ME 'DEATH' BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO KiiiiiiILLLLL YOU", respectively. This is where my trust in Christ got real...
I was going into the "transition" phase of labor. This is where women usually say "Uncle" and get drugs because the pain feels like you have 65 gremlins munching on your insides. This is where your body is transitioning you into full on push mode...it's time to actually have the baby after you get through this phase. Now mind you, usually, when you're in labor, your pain peaks and then subsides for about 3-5 mins or so at first... mine never presented such graces. From 12:30 am until 6:46 am my contractions were less than 60 seconds apart. God was truly there for me! Although that seems like a long time, when you're in labor, you seem to go into some type of time warp. It never feels like it's that long because you're so ingulfed in the happenings of labor.
I was beginning to question whether or not I was going to be able to do it. My husband was a CHAMP! He was calm and helped me breathe well, massaged everything he could and helped me to keep me calm and not panic. I never cried... i never screamed -ok twice-... and I know if it hadn't been for the Lord and my husband.. i would have been scared and SCREAMED "Uncle"! I stalled out at 7 cm and then all of a sudden felt my body start pushing! It scared me because it was totally an unassisted push! Nobody ever told me that your body would do this! The Lord spoke to me... He told me, in His own way, that my body absolutely knew how to do this and I should trust His creation. But i was in pain... I was begging for help... Me: "Nurse is there anything you can give me at this point?!!! I'm not sure I can take much more"- Nurse: "You can do this Michelle, you've done an incredible job.. you're almost there... let me check your cervix one more time". When she checked me, I was at 9 1/2 cm... it only took 20 minutes for me to jump from 7 cm all the way to 9 1/2 cm.. amazing!
My body started to push Josiah hard! He wasn't very pleased about this... he started to move his head from side to side because he's just ornery like that. Something was pushing him...so... he decided he would push back. Me: "NO, NO, NO!!! *OWW* Josiah stop moving!!!" Josiah: "Mrs. Contractions STARTED IT"!! My body then began to really push and I'm trying to tell the nurse that he's about to come and NOW because I can't stop my body from pushing. Right then Dr. Harris, impecable timing I might add, walked in ready to get down to business... my husband stepped outside the door to retrieve the coffee that my sister got for him... terrible timing on his part because my first REAL push, pushed Josiah's head out as soon as Dr. Harris sat down- Vaughan, hearing the monstrous sound that came from my throat area, hurried back in the room only to see his son's lil cone head sticking out.. Vaughan: "HOLY CRAP"... Me: "GRRRRRROWLOIULKKKUJHUFOOIUYURR#E)*(*^#>%$%%%">*%*^&^*&%@!@!!!=6+6=12>>%$%%%!!&@&&&!"..... 30 seconds later at 6:47 am Josiah's whole body flew out of me.
OMG!
His little hand shot up in the air, Me: "OMG!!! SOMEBODY JUST CAME OUT OF ME"...Vaughan: ::-0 !! They put him on my chest... i was instantly smitten. Even the weight of his body on my chest was perfect. He was meant to be there... it was destiny that at that moment in time he was on my chest... smiling at his daddy. Dr. Harris said, "He's a chubber! I bet he weighs 8lbs 8ounces".. everybody put in their own guesses to his weight. Everybody was in shock when he weighed in at exactly 8lbs 8ounces! We all shot a look over at Dr. Harris in disbelief. Amazing. Dr. Harris looked up and me and said, "Did yaw do what i told you to do?" I shouted, "HECKY NAW!! SAVED BY THE BAG"... my water bag that is.
Because I hadn't gotten any drugs... my body began to flood itself with endorphins... i was soooo high... for days i felt euphoric. So while I'm starting to feel high... my sister rips through the room almost running Dr. Harris over to come see Josiah in my arms. Dr. Harris: "Hey yaw! I'm trying to do some work down here guys!" Everybody: ::Ignore:: I cried. I cried because I couldn't believe God had just brought me through something so incredibly scary! Just something so incredible.
I'll stop here... but..
Ladies... it's okay to trust your body. When the pain got so intense that I didn't know if I could take it anymore... I know now that it was the because i was at the end. Seems to be that way with all adversity that rises against His children. He's already given your body everything it needs to give birth. I'm glad I at least gave it a go. He brought me through...
2 comments:
:) im going to give it my all and try it the natural way. u just gave me the hope.
Praise God! what an awesome God we serve. Congrats on your little one.
Post a Comment