Moving Forward on my Journey...

I'm deep into my journey... walking along on my path.  Trees are everywhere and I know there's a dense forest ahead... yet i keep walking and searching.  Searching for the depth inside.  That place that is buried because, well, i just like it that way.  We bury things we want to go away.  I'm now in a scary season.  A season where i'm digging up my own bones to bring them back to life.  I will either revive them long enough to make them extinct once and for all or ... or i don't know what.  Maybe that's the only reason I'll revive them. One way i'm going to succeed in this season: I'm keeping my promise to nurture my blog and forsake Facebook...this is gonna be difficult. 

Facebook is the devil for me! lol No. Serious. It is... i find that it distracts me and makes me angry.  All i want to do is judge people and point the finger and it makes me feel justified in my judgements!!

 Or does it?  I realize sometimes that being on Facebook and pointing the finger only distracts me from my own mess.  Now I'm sad.  I'm sad because there are things i could say to help some folks... yet how can i help somebody when my own life is in shambles?? I would be a fool to say anything at all!

I have way too much going on in my own life and walk to be worried about another.

So here I am.  I'm here.  Taking the necessary time to be introspective to gain perspective on what comes next.  I feel so frustrated.  When you're forced to peek in back of you to see the carnage you've left behind and then wonder how in the HELL you're going to make it better... i just-don't-know.  I don't feel like i have anyone i can talk to about it, other than God... who is definitely all I need... but you want others to see you and advise you as well. 

I don't care who judges me.  I don't care who sees my mess and points at me.  I don't even care if rumors start from seeing it!  I just want it to GET BETTER!  I don't know why i feel depressed sometimes... i don't know why sometimes i can't feel Christ working in my life the way i know He is.  These are questions that i feel are necessary to be answered moving forward.  "Moving Forward"... that's truly all i want.